Grandma Lil

Boy, was my Grandma Lil a special person. My favorite memories of my great grandma are all Up North in Michigan. We used to go up there when I was younger during the summer every year. We would go to her house and the instant we walked in, the smell of sweet cinnamon apple pie would overcome the entire area. It always smelled so good and Grandma Lil would serve us up hot apple pie. That is to this day the only pie I have ever liked and eaten, and probably will be the only pie I like ever. Then, Katy and I would play all afternoon in the great big green backyard. Grandma Lil would sit outside and relax with us for hours. Because I only saw her once a year, these memories were so special and resonated so well. I will never forget how special Grandma Lil made me feel and how happy she always was to see me. She is the most caring and kind-hearted woman I have ever had the privilege to know, and for that I am forever grateful. I love you Grandma Lil.

Spring Break

My spring break seemed to go by so fast, as always. Even though it's a time to relax and refresh, it never turns out that way. The first weekend was so fun, because I got to spend it with my friends on Friday and Saturday. I was busy with work as well, and getting ready to go out of town. I went to Boston, Miami, and New Orleans with my mom and dad to see new places and look at future schools. One day I was in snowy Boston, and the next day I was at the beach in Miami. We were only gone for four days, and all the travel was exhausting. I was so happy to come home and be reunited with my friends again. I spent all day on Friday with them, and then Saturday and Sunday I was working all day. Seems as though I never even got a chance to relax!! It was still a pretty fun break, though. I am so excited for fourth quarter. I'm glad it's hot again so I can spend the weekends by the pool with friends. And there's the thing every girl is talking about right now: prom. I can't wait! I know fourth quarter will fly by. One thing I am not looking forward to is the seniors graduating. I will miss them all so much... it's bittersweet. I just can't wait to finish this quarter and enjoy my summer.

Retarded - Definition Essay

           People hear it all the time. "Oh my god, I'm literally retarded at math. I got a C on the test." "He's such a retard; he doesn't even know how to speak Spanish." What are these people really trying to say? Something tells me they are not speaking of someone who is actually retarded, or a mentally handicapped person. For some reason this term has become such a casual saying, something people use to describe common everyday items. Use of the word 'retarded' for what is clearly not mentally ill is inaccurate and ignorant.

            Dictionary.com's current definition of "retard" is "a contemptuous term used to describe someone who is cognitively impaired," and "a person who is stupid, obtuse, or ineffective in some way." The word "retarded" is "characterized by a slowness or limitation in intellectual understanding and awareness, emotional development, academic progress, etc." The website even has a slang definition for "retarded": "stupid or foolish." This word comes from Latin roots, and originally meant "to slow" or "to delay" and was most often used in music to describe tempo. Around 1895, people began to use it to describe one who was mentally handicapped and therefore 'slow' (Kennon). It was a perfectly polite and politically correct term, up until about fifteen years ago when people started using it to insult others and offend them.

            Not only is calling others "retards" mindless and insensible, it is offensive to those who actually are diagnosed with mental retardation. In the New York Times article by Lawrence Downes about the progression of the word "retarded," Special Olympics athlete John Stephens begs, “When you say the 'R' word it makes people feel bad and it hurts my feelings and I don't want to hear you guys say it. Instead, you can call me a leader, a hero, or a human being, but please don't call me the 'R' word” (Downes). Having a mental illness in itself is hard enough, but being put down, made fun of, teased, and excluded is only the beginning. A simple term used to classify an illness can no longer be used without the connotation behind it of being called an idiot or a moron. Having special needs should not automatically mean one is stupid or worthless, as the term now suggests.  

            Hearing "retarded" is very hurtful and upsetting to not only those with mental illnesses, but to those who have friends and family with mental illnesses. I have two cousins who are special needs: Connie who is 46 and has mental retardation, and Damon who is 12 and has a slight form of autism, and I hate the term "retard". Connie is one of the most caring, kind, and selfless people I have ever met, and Damon is so fun and hilarious. I would never want to call my cousins retards because it seems like such a degrading and disrespectful term, even though it was originally used just for those who were mentally ill. This word seems so offensive that I can no longer use it to describe those who actually are retarded- instead, I try to stick to buffer words such as 'disabled', 'special needs', 'mentally handicapped', and other terms of the like. No one in my family uses that word because of the slang meanings for it, and we do not want to hurt our cousins' feelings. I would never want my cousins Connie or Damon to think I am making fun of her or being rude by calling her a retard. However, other teens in my grade say it "doesn't bother them" and is "usually just used while joking around." I think it is because they do not know what pain this word inflicts on those with special needs and those who have friends and family with special needs.

            The term is so frequently used in popular culture today that people do not even think twice about calling everything "retarded." Generally, the word is used by young people and teenagers. Sure, it does not seem offensive to everyone, but as soon as someone that truly is retarded comes up, the term becomes delicate and fragile and a word that is no longer used. We cannot use a word that literally means 'mentally disabled' to describe the mentally disabled?

            Most people who use this term are young and do not realize that it hurts. What are the really trying to say when they use the word "retarded"? Do they mean dumb, idiotic, ridiculous, moronic, or even half witted? Thesaurus.com even claims synonyms of retarded include dull, moronic, dim-witted, lame brained, stupid, imbecile, and so on. The word has transformed into an insult. Obviously the word has a new meaning other than its old and once intentional definitions.

            What really even makes something truly "retarded?" Once, it was the diagnosis for a mental health disease, but now just about anything slightly less than perfect qualifies. Use of this term in such inappropriate situations is insensitive, insulting, and naive. There are millions of words in the English language; use another one instead of "retarded." If we keep using this word to describe that of less than perfect quality, it gives a bad name to special needs people. Mentally handicapped is not equivalent to unintelligent. It is insulting to everyone, and there is truthfully no good reason or justification for the slang use of "retarded." Just because a friend laughs it off after being called a retard does not mean they think it is okay or harmless. A word once used to classify a mental illness has now been transformed into a word with a horrible connotation, a word that no one wants to be called. Calling someone or something 'retarded' is just plain narrow-minded and rude because it is hurtful to those who actually are affected by mental disabilities; instead, find a more constructive and definitive word to describe what you wish, such as mentally handicapped, special needs, or mentally disabled. 

Behind the title...

I named my blog The Dish. "Dish" is actually a nickname that many of my friends and family members call me. When I was younger, my dad would always be making up new nicknames to call me and one day he called me "Emilish the Dish" and it stuck. I have had this nickname for about 15 years probably, and even my teacher began to call me Dish. It also seemed fitting as my blog will be giving you an insight to my life, or giving you the dish.